Here follows some idle doodlings on recent news stories…
Dark Chocolate Cures Stress (Daily Express Nov 13) – apparently 10 squares of dark or plain chocolate can “cut the risk of heart disease, reduce blood pressure and boost brain power”. And who has discovered this revelation? None other than the ‘Nestle Research Centre’. Now correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t this something akin to humans conducting a study of Christmas and informing turkeys that there’s nothing to worry about?
Amusingly, the article was written by Laura Clout who sounds like something that Cilla Black had back in her Blind Date days.
More Junglist Shenanigans (I’m A “Celebrity” is back already) – it’s that time of year when we watch the torture of a few minor “celebs” and attempt to revive a flagging career or two. Well I don’t but, inexplicably, millions do. My view is they peaked with John Lydon and will never better those glorious few days before he stormed off back to his palatial US residence, where he doesn’t live like a king honest kids.
I checked out the latest rag bag of contestants and found that I know precisely 5 of the 11; less than half. This pleased me. Rumour has it that Jordan will join them as she hasn’t been in the news enough recently.
Camilla Dallerup phobia – creepy-crawlies. Jimmy White phobia – snakes. Sam Fox phobia – snakes & spiders. Of course.
They’ve finally laid Big Brother to rest and it is time to pull the plug on this tiresome tosh.
Immigration Controls Are A Joke says Damian Green – no Damian “I went to the local video shop and I said, ‘Can I borrow Batman Forever?’ He said, ‘No, you’ll have to bring it back tomorrow’” is a joke, Immigration Controls are a disgrace.
The Ashes To Return To Terrestrial TV – about time too. In a week when BBC exec earnings are revealed we remind ourselves how many of sports’ ‘Crown Jewels’ have been missing from free to air television. Moves are afoot to protect events such as The Open golf, Wimbledon and Rugby World Cup.
I propose they add the Darts World Championship to this list. What’s that you say BDO darts person? The Beeb already show the Lakeside World Professional Darts Championship every January? Really? Does Phil Taylor play in it? No? Then it’s not the World Darts Championship and never will be until they combine the two. Get the real one on free telly I say.
BBC Earnings Revealed – while we’re on the subject actually, let’s just look at what the Beeb chiefs and their cronies are earning. Director General, Mark Thompson, earns £850k a year. 46 senior managers earn more than Gordon Brown. Not surprisingly, there’s a rabid expenses culture as well.
What alarms me most though isn’t these obscene sums for the top bods, wrong as they are, it’s the huge salaries given to aides, advisors and glorified PA’s. Jessica Cecil is paid £130,000 to “run Mr Thompson’s office”. Claire Dresser is paid £103,000 to run Jana Bennett’s office. To run an office! Richard Addy was paid £109,000 to be an advisor. He must have some pretty damn good advice for that kind of money.
In the wake of MP’s expenses, MoD TA cutbacks, MoD bonuses, and a global credit crisis caused by wide boy financiers, it’s another smack in the mouth for the masses. It is starting to feel like they are dragging our fingernails down a blackboard and there’s nothing we can do to escape. We are run by an establishment that is horrifically out of touch with the real world. Send them all into The Jungle I say.
